Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
He kept saying it was because he was allergic to the chicken. Then he threw up on my mom.
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
Woke up next to a half eaten California burrito. It was tucked in.
He said he was trying to live vicariously through me. I didn't have the heart to tell him that meant he was vicariously fucking his best friend.
That reminds me of that one time you handcuffed me to a table leg while I was reaching for the vodka.
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
I need water and some morals
Randomize
