We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
He pointed at me, then leaned in and said "shes the best at blow jobs" then chris fist pumped him and said "dude, I know"
There really needs to be a redbox for wine because I want some but too lazy to walk into a store
Last night was a "wash hands with dog shampoo" kind of night
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
Randomize
