eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
I've started bribing my dorm's security guard with cookies so that he doesn't tell all the boys i'm hooking up with about each other.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
just found out i can blow out the flame on the grill lighter fill my mouth with butane and ignite a fireball
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've talked to too many cops in one week and I haven't even committed any crimes. I hate the suburbs
She's not answering my calls
Well it sounds like you really fucked up
WHO HOLDS A GRUDGE OVER MEMES
The prescription the hospital gave me for pain and nausea doubles for my hangovers... Maybe I'll hit up the ER more often
Maybe life is about finding the person you DO want to cuddle with after they rail you like a porn star
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize