It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
I love you more than champagne and correct grammar
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
Today I had sex and flossed at the same time. My relationship goals have been exceeded.
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
LIKE ALL I WANT TO CURE MY HANGOVER IS PORKROLL AND LIKE 85% OF THIS COUNTRY DOESN'T KNOW WHAT IT IS
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
I wish I could send you one of those donuts I had. Like teleport it to you. Because it would change your life
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
Last time we had sex i was dressed like a ninja turtle and someone else was in our bed, so this time should be fine.
I hope ur kiddin
wish i was
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