So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
We're the kind of people who ruin family vacations
You hit on the cop telling him you were celebrating the anniversary of your 21st birthday and ur boob job... That's how he got ur #
ah tequila...
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
Did you like my voicemail? Sounded like I was being murdered, right?
By a pack of ravenous dildos
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
I thought this boy told me to choke him, so I went all in. Turns out he really said “stroke.”
Randomize
