Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
Only I could run tino my father in law while looking at condoms at Rite Aid. At 730 on a Thursday morning. I'm in trouble.
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
I LEAVE YOU TWO ALONE FOR 45 MINUTES AND ALL MY WHIPPED CREAM AND CONDOMS ARE GONE
My dating life has become some fucked up hydra of dicks; you cut one off and two pop up in its place.
btw telling the cab driver, that took you to your booty call that is now returning your wallet that you left in his cab, that you want to hug him is awkward
okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
Who gets call-your-ex-from-4-years-ago drunk on a Thursday??
I'll like his pictures on Instagram every once and a while so that when he sees my name he is reminded of the best blow job he's ever gotten.
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
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