Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
The last thing I remember is funneling tequila out of a pink noodle.
I found out what happened to my eye. I punched myself in the face.
I am literally using a balloon as a pillow on a park bench.
I got laid and laid off at a conference in long beach all on the same day
Eh. They balance each other out
I'm sitting at work trying to dust glitter off my pants. I can't hang out with her anymore.
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
so he'll eat food out of a dumpster but he won't lick your ass?
Fuck. I think I can already feel tomorrow's hangover. It's like future me cane back to warn present me about the impending doom but didn't turn the time dial back far enough.
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
Randomize
