I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
Some chick just tried to plug her vodka into the wall.
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
Bartender at the wedding asked if he was making my drinks too strong. I laughed at him.
I've slipped into the part of my life where I am not having sex to get Phils tickets from this chick. I need to seriously rethink my life decisions
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
you were drunkenly making out with a 20-something in front of your wife. at least the guy your wife left with was decent looking.
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
We're doing a team debriefing of Saturday night in group text right now. As 75% of the female presence at that party we saw some shit.
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
Randomize
