All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
He sent me a snap chat of his naked torso with cookies over his nipples. Like.... that does not make me want you homeboy.
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
I woke up in Brittany's thong, Tony's shirt, and an oven mitt
I went on a psycho cleaning spree so I feel I've earned the right to spend the day in bed watching porn and eating sausage biscuits. If you bring alcohol you can join me.
All other girlfriends are inferior. You are the chosen one.
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
are you inviting me to ice cream?
the subtext of everything i say to you is inviting you to ice cream
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