Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
I woke up with someone else's vomit on my ass. That's how I'm doing today.
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
It's not a real holiday until someone pees on you. Did someone pee on you?
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
His cat watched us the ENTIRE time. Every time I glanced over the poor kitty looked at me as if I were pelvic thrusting her father to death.
BOOM BITCH SERVES YOU RIGHT I HOPE YOU SHIT YOURSELF PETER PAN
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