Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
getting caught by my parents in bed with another guy was way easier coming out than telling them over dinner like I had planned.
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
don't care how drunk i am. my dick was like "nope, not doing it, you can't make me and i was like oh yes i can"
In honor of Dennis Farina dying, I'm offering up free mustache rides...2 takers so far.
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
Randomize
