I'm so hungover And my mouth is so dry it feels like my tongue is wearing a sweater
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
i just ran into my boss at the liquor store. we didnt exchange words, just nodded in mutual understanding.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
Tell me you didn't have sex with my dad.
Oh no I would never do that to her. But when you're single again let me know. Cheating penis is definitely better than single penis. But she has claws.
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
Can you pick me up a bottle of make-an-ass-of-myself tonight?
Do you want cuervo gold or silver?
You had a hot dog outside the bar then made me stop at McDonald's for a double quarter pounder. I'd say you've more than filled your drunken meat quota.
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
There's Dick Pix, Zorro, and The Little Engine that Could. I nickname my fuck buddies for the exact same reason why you don't name animals which you will one day have for dinner.
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