We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
I'm going to text my booty call and tell him nevermind, that I got the job finished by myself. That will teach him to text back faster.
This lesson is brought you by a psychology class.
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
He offered me free drinks all night if I could beat him in a drinking race. I blacked out after that but just found his credit card in my bra so there's that.
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
I have just discovered the land of milk and honey. and by milk i mean vodka and by honey i mean tequila.
Randomize