So... how did lowering your standards work out last night?
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
i just opened a bottle of wine with my dads power tools
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
If we can only get laid once in a blue moon, apparently this will be our month.
Then mom squeezed my boob and said, "Dad would go nuts if I had these..."
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
I feel bad cuz I was his ride home, but I didn't know I was going to have a religious experience with a guy in a cookie monster t-shirt. You can't plan for that shit.
I need a drink. No, several. I need several drinks. Drunk, I need to be drunk. Definitely need to be drunk
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
Randomize
