all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
I fucking hate you. Some slutty looking drunk chick backed her ass up across the bar and started grinding on you. You ignored her because you didn't want to share you drink
I care about my drink far more than her feelings
Yes I did. Thanks. I was actually an hour and half early. I'm better at public transport than I thought. Guy behind me on the bus is also crying. We compared cry-snot. It was nice in a weird sad way.
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
Me sprinting out of your house without my bra or shoes is our entire relationship defined in a single moment.
Whatever, you're gonna have to break it to mom that the reason I was so drunk at Christmas dinner is because she wouldn't stop asking me why I don't have a boyfriend
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