Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
I'm drunk enough to talk Barbara Walters outta her panties
Never underestimate the healing power of vomiting and a bath.
I know that was a dream because I woke up and there was no pizza
The hookers weren't a dream get tested
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
She turned off her phone alarm (which was the theme song to Star Wars) and then asked me if I wanted a blow job before she went...of course I am going to see her again.
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
Of course you try to burn the house down on the one night we take down the smoke alarm so we can use the fog machine more
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