do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
Please tell me you did not just serenade her with "Let's Get it On"?
Yeah I think it worked. My penis thanks you, Captain Morgan.
I told her I had to go to work this morning, got fully dressed in a suit, walked her out, drove around the block, parked, and walked right back in my apt and went back to sleep..
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
I was trying to be really smart and save 10 dollars for each cab there and back. ...so I ripped a $20 dollar bill in half.
theres a wall by my room thats like, a prime fucking wall. before i move out SOMEBODY is gonna fuck me on that wall, goddamnit.
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
My boss just called me for legal advice. What has my life become?
He wanted to have sex in a church because he has keys to it from court-ordered community service. WHAT IS STANDARDS?
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
Ok: all ex-gfs except you from the last 5 years have or are about to have a baby...be on the lookout...
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
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