i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
Woke up to a denim duvet cover this morning... why r guys so tacky?
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
All signs point to mom being high. 1) making chicken at 2 am. 2) dancing to smooth jazz. 3) she asked where the peanut butter was
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
So I fucked him. Then I MC Hammer'd to the bathroom, where I did the robot in celebration of my accomplishment. And then I spent 10 mins fixing my toilet. But YOLO.
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
Randomize
