I just used my 2 drink stirrers as chopsticks to get a lime out of my drink. I really am Asian.
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
Just had a drunken guest at my hotel threaten to "throw a fuckin fireball at my face"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You tripped over nothing.. everyone stopped what they were doing and stared..you stood up and yelled "you win this time gravity"..then started chugging someone's drink
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
He fucked me for my Netflix login, I fucked him for his HBO login, and actually I think that's beautiful
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
My roommate just angrily told the cat he should have knocked, but that's not lockdown madness. They're always like that.
Randomize