As my groomsman, I expect you to learn the Thriller dance with me before next September.
i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
He had seven beers and tap-danced on the table like a pro. HOW DOES HE DO IT
Threw up on the baby. National Tequila Day is the eve of National I'm A Horrible Nanny Day.
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
Almost caused a huge accident on the highway because I was distracted by how orange the road barrels were
The guy that stalks me just looked out his window and saw me in his neighbor's hot tub. Get your shit ready the fraternity wars are starting.
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
Randomize
