direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
I have a new reason to go to work: I can tell which 3 of my coworkers are sisters just by looking at their butts.
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
Question: When you have the names of 4 guys tattoo'd on you, how do you make the 5th one real special?
Last night you were prentending to be a broom stick...you were laying on the floor and humming the Harry potter song.
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
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