just woke up and my boobs have "fun police" written on them
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
I asked for a cup of water. They gave me tequila. They WANT ME TO DIE
Death by dick. An honorable death. Put a picture of his dick in the photo collage at my funeral.
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
When we got into his bed, his damn parrot started making sex noises in the other room
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
Randomize
