Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
As I type I'm climbing my cousins swingset so I can take a nap inside the slide. Fuck this hangover. I always win.
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
THE MAINTENANCE MEN WERE DOWN STAIRS AND I THOUGHT THEY WERE MY MOM. I'VE BEEN YELLING 'GRILL ME A CHEESE' AT THEM FOR HALF AN HOUR
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
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