yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
decided to have an easter egg hunt this year. the golden egg has weed in it and all the others have shots of vodka. who said we were too old for easter?!?
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
Dude, Taco Bell gave me a free fiesta potatoes when I won a bet on wether I could fit the entire rim of a cup in my mouth.
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
But seriously, I love having sex with you and simultaneously know I never wanna date you.
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
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