dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
i will soon be in a relationship on fb
you!?
me and your mom. i mean, lisa.
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
don't thank me. stop putting your penis in foreign objects.
you started crying about dinosaurs being extinct
that's why i woke up holding that dina girls hand
she's a dina-saur
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
His pick up line was "your one sexy pumpkin, I'd love to carve." Why would you let me go home with him?
The guy you hooked up with is asleep in the tub. I just pee'd and he said 'turn off the tap' before snoring again.
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
FUCK YEAH PUPPY BOWL
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
I had a threesome with my hot neighbor and his GF and by threesome I mean I heard them getting it on in their apartment and I was in my apartment with a vibrator
and I may have moaned his name loud enough that they heard me because now he won’t make eye contact
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