You drink too much
No, I drink just the right amount - too often.
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
I'm babysitting and we're watching Barney and I don't understand why Barney can magically make band hats appear but he makes them make shitty ass instruments.
Barney's a jerk
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I woke up at 3am naked and stroking a watermelon.
Drunk off five beers on a Tuesday. I'm not sure which part of that statement is more sad
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
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