when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth
he said i give him, and i quote, "emotional blue balls"
i will replace your cream cheese. there's enough for breakfast. you are my friend. i had guests we wanted bagels so bad im sorry. i left you notes. i love you. you have enough for a bagel or two and i will get you more. you are so pretty.
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.
Accomplishment of the day: changing my tampon at 38,000 ft with turbulence. Fasten seatbelt sign was definitely on.
He thought I was gay. I had to explain I just really like wearing flannel.
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
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