It made me feel like I need a reality show of my life so I could go back and watch the episodes to figure out how I got from the trunk of the car to my neighbors tree house...
Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
Just invented taco cereal.
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
So after my hot dog popped out of the bun and fell to the ground I tried to pick it back up and eat it. He had to kick it away from me to stop me from trying to pick it back up and eat it. I like him.
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
The cop took you back from the hospital and the lady at the front desk said "how are you doing cal?" You said "how do you know my name?" she responded "you're the only person i've ever seen that can throw up in your back pocket." Skills dude.
As a paramedic, it's completely unacceptable to black out on a monday. I cant handle 3 dollar shot night.
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