dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
Sarah's knitting me a hat as an apology for unknowingly making out with my boyfriend
I love it when he cheats on me with nice people
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
You need to be on (or possibly create) the international emoji committee to address all of these glaring oversights
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
There's even glitter on my cock...
Let me set the mood for you. Do you remember Britney Spears in her Hit Me Baby One More Time era? Well I just fucked this college girl I shit you not her name is Persephone and she looks exactly like Britney Spears back when she was hot. I might be in love.
Randomize
