K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
Halfway through banging her I realized that she was playing a sex playlist on her iPod...first time actually having sex to R.Kelly's "bump and grind"
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
There is only one good excuse for how sore I am right now. And that is incredibly acrobatic sex. Unfortunately for me that is not my excuse.
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
This lady gave me four cups to go along with my gallon of daiquiri. Silly girl, all I need is a straw.
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
I need to stop being so honest when I'm drunk. I got proposed to by a stranger again last night. It's not my fault that I would be perfectly ok making sandwiches and giving blow jobs for the rest of my life.
Randomize
