I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
I walk in and my mom has a Christian workout program playing. It's like, gospel music with an "electronic" beat to go with it. And then they try to save your soul at the end. I hate being home.
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
I tell you, MacGyver never had to put up with people shitting themselves while he worked...
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
It's okay I didn't send any nudes tonight so we are safe *inserts photo of a baseball umpire doing the safe signal*
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
Boredom is so much more tolerable when you're stoned off your ass.
Randomize
