: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
when i got to my bed there was a handwritten note that said "wash the sheets." sleeping on the couch.
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
The bar has bullet holes in the ceiling, and the country singer had been playing drunken weezer covers. A man just bought me a beer on the grounds that I 'have his back' in a fist fight with a stranger texan. And, yes, the bartender is wearing a sherif's badge
Hey will pizza rolls help if you accidentally get a diabetic chihuahua drunk?
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
we played his NES Classic. Turns out there is a warp zone to my vagina.
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