I told him I'm not paying rent anymore because he's seen my boobs.
Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
I wish i could 80s montage me losing weight
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
For Halloween this year I'm going to paint myself in gold, wear a golden toga and sash saying " cunt goddess"
My sister texted me to say she just found a corn on the cob in her purse from last night. You need to party with us more.
That broad from the bar put her name in my phone as "The girl I'm going to marry in 10 years".
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize
