capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
so I told him I hadn't been laid since Bush was president. Right after he cums, he says "Welcome to the Obama Administration".
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
Don't tell me 'the Fonzie' doesn't work. Went to see Shakespeare high and gave the sign to the dude playing Macbeth. Now at a cast party getting blown. All hail the Fonz.
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
Doing the walk of shame from the back of a Jeep to the porta potty it's parked next to while your dad watches is not what you want.
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
Randomize
