if i'm ever as drunk as the girl in front of me... kill me.
My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
I keep trying to sit and the chair keeps running away from me
I have discovered something important. The trick to making food taste better is not always 'more hot sauce'.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
you're not a real person. you're actually just like a box of wine that can talk
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
Randomize