This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
Things I've learned: after you move in with a girl it's much less satisfying to wipe your dick on her sheets after sex because now they're your sheets too
i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
I almost wrecked my car because of a guy in skinny jeans had a boner
Okay she just told me to turn the volume down on the fan. What does this even mean?
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
tell him if he brings over dinner you might let him see your left boob...or right, whichever you prefer. But under no circumstances do you let him see both...unless he brings a good desert...like coffee ice cream or something
So, I'm roughly 90% sure that the guy next to me in the xray waiting room is watching porn on his phone right now
Randomize
