I have to look really hot tonight because my personality is going to suck.
He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
Dude, seduce him with cookies. You almost turned me gay with scones. Don't be surprised when they get you laid.
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
Just got a blow job from a woman on a ski slope. She said ski'ing frightens her and giving head calms her down. Glad I could help ma'am!
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
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