This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
Thank God for cruise control and the Starbucks cup I had to puke in.
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
You passed out in my bathroom last night. I put a towel over your face so I could shit without it being gay
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
Remind me to tell you how I've been deaf since Sunday at 1245
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
He ate me out while watching Fifty Shades of Grey---needless to say I'm locking this down
Something I never want to forget. I'm in a porta potty and she is outside knocking on the door going "You're a queen. You're a queen. Never think any different"
I woke up in his closet, with my shirt inside out and backwards, Rolos in my hand, a tortilla with a face carved into it stuck to the fridge with a magnet, a homemade bong next to the bed, and the door off the hinges... I need a chaperone.
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
Randomize