I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
Some clips from last night: grinded like I haven't since college. Took shots with a bartender with a bad ass mustache. Made up a string of lies with fake names and occupations. Slept behind the couch with pizza in my hand
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
You need to go! It’s a midwestern wedding - the single girls out there think life ends at 25 if they don’t have a picket fence and family. That’s when your penis introduces himself
Never thought I’d use my computer science degree for teledildonics, but here I am
Randomize
