On a scale from 0 to 24...wait, 3 to 24, where 6 is the lowest and 12 is the highest, how freaking high re you right now?
I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
im about as happy as oj after his trial
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
I walk in and my mom has a Christian workout program playing. It's like, gospel music with an "electronic" beat to go with it. And then they try to save your soul at the end. I hate being home.
I know of an excellent nanny. A lot like Mary Poppins but way cooler. And likes pot.
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
This is classic penis vs brain.
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
Randomize
