We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
Fairly certain I called dibs on your lesbian virginity last night
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
I have been referring to it as "thanks for getting out of me day" all week. Do you think they will still take me to brunch tomorrow?
He was in the middle of making out with two girls at once, but then the guy next to me said "I feel like I'm watching Animal Planet" he stopped to give him a high five
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
Randomize
