Just gargled Fireball to get the fish taco taste out of my mouth. Almost as good as gum.
clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
home. puking in laundry basket.
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
Now I get the fucking shakes every time I hear I'm Sexy And I Know It. Thanks, Captain Morgan.
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
Last night I watered my lawn and smoked a joint then cooked a steak. I'm really killing this adulthood thing.
If you can throw 105 mph it’s mandatory that you’re hung.
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