Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
Sponge bath it is.
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
You said your legs stopped working and then pulled yourself around the floor with your hands.
That explains the wood chips stuck in my nipples.
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
I love my life sometimes. I do miss being an adult, from time to time, but a little vodka always changes my mind.
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
Last night you made me help you pick the raisins out of a kashi bar and acted like it was the most important thing to ever happen to you or our friendship
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
Randomize
