When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
I drove your lawn mower home. Hope you don't need it tonight. I'll bring it over tomorrow.
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
When I am this hungover I become increasingly grateful for having my own private office
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
He said he broke his back in 3 spots & my first thought was "there goes my booty call".
Did u have a 2nd thought
I need a new booty call.
Randomize
