too bad you live with your parents still
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you assured me you'd make it home safe because your pizza rolls were waiting up for you.
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
Sometimes I think that I have too much self esteem
Then I realize that I'm just really fucking pretty.
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
He's unconstrained by sanity, physics, or his liver.
I melted cheese on my pizza rolls. When I die make sure someone melts cheese on my rolls.
He was all “please don’t bail because I’m missing work for this” last night
Honey no, I need dick. I’m not going to bail
Randomize