hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
I molested 6 butterflies tonight
i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
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while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
I've decided to tape numbers to the bottom of my heels corresponding to the number of drinks I can safely consume in them.
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
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You kept saying we got to find the end of the rainbow, which turned out to be a box of lucky charms and Guinness in the bag of cereal
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
She said she didn't feel right fucking on her parents dining room table I grabbed the only thing around bubblewrap she blew me for creativity
I just said "I love my cat" as a hobby.
I drove them away with my sparkling personality and LOTR references.
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