ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
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They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
I'm chatting with a girl missing a front tooth. I find it quite distracting. I'm sure you have deduced what bar I'm drinking in on this monday night.
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
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Man, I meant to go dancing, but accidentally took mushrooms and just threw the frisbee in the park
Surprise ending
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
Things he's good at: oral sex and geometry. Things he's not good at: actual sex.
I have an empty apartment, Chinese food, and fresh batteries in my vibrator. There's nothing on this earth that could lure me out tonight.
Good, but still not as good as the guy I banged in the ball crawl
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