I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
You drink too much
No, I drink just the right amount - too often.
I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
She kept saying the tortilla understood her. I honestly don't know where she found a tortilla at the pool.
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
Taking shots of gin by myself out of TMNT glasses and chasing with bites of chocolate cake. AMERICA.
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
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