Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
also, i may or may not be wearing a cape right now. hint: i am.
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
Nothing says walk of shame better than a onesie and a 12 pack of corona..
You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
Sean getting laid is an anomaly, Sean banging the hottest single girl at the wedding is a fucking unicorn being ridden by a leprechaun walking through mordor.
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
From one hot mess to another... Get it together.
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
Randomize
