it was like eating out sand paper
Sober December ended when I found beer behind my bed...I lost $2000 but spent 6 hours sober. Meet me at the bar?
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
That sad moment when even your drug dealer lands a summer internship and you don't...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
We've started traveling with Michael and Patrick so we can pretend we're two legit straight couples.
A charade that fell apart the second another couple on the cruse found Sarah face down in my box on an observation deck.
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
Well I shit myself on the way home from work today so there's that...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
I woke up with her finger in my vag. Let's just say that I'm one horny inquisitive drunk.
I only wore my thong with cheeseburgers on it because I thought we'd have sex. So I basically wasted my best thong for nothing.
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
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