We're like a lot better than the average bears
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
Notice: I will be intoxicated and in your area this evening. To unsubscribe from my sexual solicitation list, reply 'fuck off'.
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
Everyone here is taking crazy amounts of mescaline and I'm just over here like hey have you tried the pretzel rolls mmm
Well, while we went through airport security, I found out Mom got her clit pierced, so there's that.
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize
