let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
I have a great idea. you just need to get pregnant.
Mother, no, i will not talk about this again. Please stop planning my unborn daughters life. I will not put her in pagents. That is trashy. Stop watching toddlers in tiaras. It is also trashy. I love you.
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
She sneezed like 10 times, put her head down on the table and then laid down on their couch and fell asleep. In the middle of the dominoes game. I'll never understand why my dad continues to provide my mom wine.
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
You looked at the bouncer while you pissed on the front door of the bar and said...who the fuck are you?
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
You know the story of the boner party, right? They got stuck in the mountains and ate each other?
It was the Donner party... boner party was the porn version...
Randomize
